It’s Friday! And it’s been a very good week, so I’ve got plenty of favorites to share. Running has taken center stage recently (where it belongs) and so that’s the theme of this week’s list!Read More
Sometimes, things in your life time themselves out perfectly. The pieces fall into place and it seems like whatever it is is just meant to be.Read More
Yesterday was a fairly lazy day for me. It was Sunday, after all, and I ran a 5K and got in a lot of walking on the day before, so there’s nothing wrong with a little rest. But something about sitting on the couch all day rankled, so at 8:30 p.m. I put on my shoes and headed out for a walk.Read More
I’m back this Friday with some more of my current favorite things/products/experiences/foods etc… This was a particularly good week in terms of new experiences/things I tried, so I have a bunch of new things I’m geeking out over. Let’s dive in!Read More
Have you ever had one of those weekends where everything just went really right? This weekend was one of those for me.Read More
As I work to figure out what the identity of this blog is, I want to try some new things with it to get the creative juices flowing and see what works. With that in mind, I’m cooking up some weekly feature ideas, one-off posts and even some recipes that I’d like to share. So to kick that off, I’m launching my first Friday Favorites feature!Read More
It’s been about a month since I finished my first round of Whole30, and I’m still amazed by what I learned in that month. I haven’t been 100 percent clean in my eating by any stretch of the imagination since then, but I am definitely much more aware of how food makes me feel than I ever was before. Most notably, I can really tell a difference between how my body reacts when I do and do not eat gluten. When I eat it, my skin tends to break out in a rash, but when I avoid it — as I have for most of the last week — I feel so much better.Read More
Kyle was home recently for about two weeks, just a quick vacation before setting out for the next/final (hopefully?) 100 days of his deployment. I really wanted to maximize our time together — meaning I didn’t want to sit around the apartment doing nothing like we’re prone to do — and I think we did a good job of that. We ran a 5K and went to Kentucky Derby get-together (no hat for me). We went hiking. We saw Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (****). We made filet mignon (future post because OMG is that good shit).
I’ve written about our LDR before, but when he was home, I got to thinking about some of the things I’ve learned during the times we’ve been long-distance. It hasn’t been easy, and I’ve had to adapt A LOT from starting our relationship long-distance to living together to going back to long-distance again. There have been plenty of lessons I’ve had to learn, but I want to talk about the five biggest ones.
Things You Learn From A Long-Distance Relationship
1. The importance of communication: This is pretty simple, but being a) in regular contact and b) open about your thoughts and feelings is key to getting through a long-distance relationship. We text every day and FaceTime almost every day. We say good morning and good night. Ask after each other’s sleep, how we’re feeling, what happened in our days. It may seem little, but it adds up and means a lot in the long run. A relationship where you only check in once in a while is not set up for success. But beyond the everyday minutiae and the physical act of communication, it’s important to be open and communicating about what’s going on in your relationship. Do you feel distant? Is there something wrong? Are you particularly sad or happy or angry one day? What does the future look like? You need to talk about those things to ensure a healthy, open, honest relationship can flourish. Those are the ones that survive.
2. How to entertain yourself: I’ll be honest, when Kyle is home and I know he’s only going to be home for a limited amount of time, I get a little one-minded. I tend to put all of my attention on spending time together. Put another way, I don’t do a lot of me-time when we’re together. As an INFP, it’s kind of interesting because I typically really need that me-time to recharge, but Kyle is the only one I don’t feel like an introvert around; he might be the only human on the planet I don’t need to retreat from. Still, that’s created its own kind of dependence, so when he’s gone, I have to find other ways to entertain myself. This isn’t too hard for me because I have no problem being alone, but it can be tough when you’re used to having someone around. I typically spend more time reading, working out and writing, which are all good things.
3. Something about independence: Piggy-backing off No. 2, LDRs force you to be independent. I’ve always been an SIW (c) (strong, independent woman), but even the most independent people are allowed to let themselves be cared for by their significant others. But when your SO lives 700 miles away, that can be hard. I make sure the rent is paid and buy the groceries. The few (lol) social functions I go to, I go to alone (and I tend to use him as a crutch when he’s home). And those habits I talked about above? I get myself into a rhythm with them, which actually makes them easier to maintain when he’s at home, adding another layer of independence. Two winters ago, Kyle came to stay with me for three weeks before we moved in together and I didn’t work out at all during that time. It was no bueno, and not the kind of habit I want to cultivate.
4. How precious your time together really is: Kyle was home for 11 full days, two of which I actually had to leave the state for for work. So we had nine days we had to make count. Being apart most of the year is hard when he’s deployed, so I try to make a point of trying to do things we like to do, cook the kinds of foods we like to eat and just generally enjoy each other’s company. He’s been deployed for about 200 days now, and I estimate that we’ve had about 30 days together in that span. That’s 15 percent. Looking at those numbers, I’ve really come to appreciate the time we do have together. It won’t be like this forever, I know, but I also know that we’re getting stronger because of it.
5. To appreciate the effort it takes to see one another: I went to visit once at the beginning of his deployment and I will tell you — it was a JOURNEY. Two hours to the airport, a two-hour flight, then three hours from the airport. Yeesh. It was a long day. Kyle’s got it a little easier because when he travels home, the government pays for it, and he gets to fly out of his local airport because of it. But it's still a hike. But the hike is worth it because we just genuinely enjoy being together and spending time with each other. Otherwise, we wouldn’t be doing this, right?
Questions for you!
Are you in a long-distance relationship? What have you learned from it?
What's your favorite thing to do when you're together?
I don’t get a whole lot of weekends that include both Saturday and Sunday in the months from August through May, so this past weekend was a rare treat with the school year winding down. With Kyle home, I wanted to take full advantage — especially because I will be out of town this upcoming weekend — so I suggested a hiking trip at Warren Dunes State Park in Michigan.Read More
About a month ago when I knew Kyle was coming home for a few weeks, I asked him about joining me for a 5K that I knew would be this weekend. We are both conscious of our need to get in better shape, and so while I was more eager, he begrudgingly agreed.Read More
At the beginning of 2017, I did what a lot of people do at the start of a new year: made resolutions for the year ahead. But rather than make vague promises to myself like “I’m going to get in shape in 2017!” and “I’m going to learn something new!” I made my goals specific, something to strive for. I knew I wanted to read more this year, so I made a goal to read 50 books in 12 months. I’ve decided to recap what I read each month, reflect on the material and rate each book’s recommend-ability (which I just made up).Read More
Happy Tuesday! It’s been a week since my last post, partly because of traveling for work and laziness, partly because of lack of inspiration, but now I’m ready to jump back in here and, with the benefit of some time to reflect, recap my Whole30.Read More
Guys. It is DAY 30! I have made it to the finish line of my Whole30 — an entire month without added sugar, dairy, grains (aka the Good Stuff). When I started this, I really wasn’t sure how if I would make it to the end, but I crushed this thing. A full recap will be forthcoming, but right now I’ll just say that I feel like, if nothing else, I understand a lot more about fueling my body in a healthy way, and I feel better than ever.Read More
Happy Monday! Today is Day 29 of my Whole30, and I am so excited! Aside from a few really strong cravings for pizza — all of which came between Friday and Sunday — these past 28 days have been fairly smooth for me, and I’m feeling fantastic!Read More
Self-care is a big thing these days, and for good reason. We’re surrounded by so much noise that it can be easy to be swallowed by it all. From constant social media updates, to the 24-hour news cycle, to the seemingly growing demand to be ever-more productive at work, the demands on our attention can not only be never-ending, but a significant source of stress.Read More
I recently took a personality assessment on a website called 16personalities.com. Now, I’ve taken personality assessments before, but none that I thought did as good a job at nailing down how I see the world as this one. It was a little startling, but honestly a huge relief to know that someone out there understood a little bit about me and the way I operate.Read More
I work a stupid amount of hours, and I say that with a lot of gratitude for the job I have. Still, when you work in college sports PR, 60-80 hour weeks are not out of the norm for nine months out of the year. Working nights and weekends, on top of a typical 9-5 schedule, can eat a lot of my free time and, with it, my motivation to work out.Read More
The topic of diets is still pretty taboo in our culture, and I mean diet in the "Mediterranean diet" sense of the word; not to be confused with the "Atkins diet" sense of the word. You could have the healthiest diet on the planet and still catch flak for being some kind of hippie or something (I love hippies, so let's talk!).Read More